How should Christians respond to those who condemn us as "haters" when we profess what the Bible says about, for example, homosexuality?

When love is such a central part of our convictions, it is disheartening to be so regularly accused of being haters. Yet this happens a lot. Whether the accusation is leveled against us as malicious slander or because of misunderstanding or ignorance, we owe people a response.

Start with self-examination

The fact that many in our culture have negative impressions of conservative Christians has, in part, been linked to inadequate attitudes or statements by Christians. Is our primary focus on lifestyle and "sin management" as the core measurement of spirituality? Has "trying hard to do what God commands" become the heart of our religion? Do we live for mutual approval within our own ranks while decrying the sins of others so much that we appear to have forgotten about grace? Do we fail to listen and simply condemn with pat responses?

The preceding questions are not charges but invitations for self-appraisal. Sometimes a damaged reputation is partially self-inflicted.

Have reasonable expectations

Christianity is always countercultural. "If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you" (John 15:18,19). Many who charge us with hatred are not interested in what we really want or why. They have correctly determined that conservative Christians will never accept or tolerate principles or lifestyle patterns different from Christ, so they fiercely oppose us through the media, ill-defined "hate crimes" legislation, or what ever means at their disposal. "Do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. . . . If you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name" (1 Peter 4:12,16).

This counsel does not solve the problem but puts it into a healthy perspective. 

Maintain biblical balance

A major ongoing challenge is keeping our biblical convictions and biblical compassion in balance as we reach out to others. God-given convictions are not negotiable. But we also are not interested in sharing the truth in ways that unnecessarily invite ridicule or caricature. Humble compassion and Christlike sympathy remain important. To quote the old adage: "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care." While testifying to truth, our tone of voice and facial expression are more important than we think.